For those who don't know, I have recently returned to good old SUNY New Paltz in hopes of becoming a high school English teacher. I've been taking English classes but haven't applied to the School of Education yet. I needed to take some classes and raise my GPA because it just wasn't up to snuff. I am applying at the end of the month and just recently finished the obligatory essay. I am slightly embarrassed to post it on here, but am reassured knowing that Danny is really the only person who reads this on a regular basis. Hi Dan.
Anyway, the reason i am posting this is because i need some feedback. Not just on grammar and structure, but on the overall feeling that you get from reading it. Is it believable? Is it too forward or arrogant? Too cheesy? Maybe even a little too awesome? I am pretty satisfied with the finished product but need it to be near perfect in order to overcome my poor GPA. Let me know if i should make any changes. Thanks. Here it is...
If the aim of the Professional Education Unit of SUNY New Paltz is to “prepare caring and critical professionals for a diverse society”, I believe I have an advantage over other students. I have already gone through the rigors of the undergraduate program and I have gained intangible experience through my adult life. I already consider myself to be a caring and critical person, fully appreciative of our diverse society. What I desire and require from the New Paltz School of Education is the knowledge and qualifications to become a professional English teacher.
To me, being an educator is not just a job. It is a responsibility and an opportunity to be a positive influence in the lives of a younger generation. I would not only teach the importance of language, grammar and literature, but also connect these matters to the more important aspects of our lives. Teaching the importance of these disciplines does not just enhance the child’s life, but helps to further our community and society as a whole.
I want to be an advocate for the younger generations. Their creativity, social awareness, and technological savvy are severely underappreciated. Instead, children are considered spoiled by the social and technological advancements that past generations have worked so hard to allow them to have. They are becoming jaded by war, divorce, politics, and corporatization and I want to change that. I want to give young people the know-how and the elbow grease to go confidently into the “real world” and believe that they can make a real difference.
I am also interested in becoming involved in high school sports programs. Organized sports were a crucial part of my development and I believe that they can play an important role in the lives of young men and women. When managed properly, sports can promote health and physical fitness, teamwork, responsibility, leadership, and time management in a fun and social environment. These activities also give young people something positive to do with their time after school that might otherwise be spent getting into trouble.
The only factor that may be holding me back from acceptance into the Secondary Education program is my questionable grade point average. Unfortunately, I was more dedicated to socializing than to my education during my first year at SUNY New Paltz and this is apparent in my cumulative GPA. I am now a dedicated and focused student and this is evident in the grades I have received since returning to school.
During the last year and a half I have been working in the children’s program at the Mohonk Mountain House. I find working with children to be both fun and rewarding. My genuine and passionate personality and sense of humor help me connect with young people and I sincerely hope to be a positive influence in their lives. I would take such pleasure in helping just one child to succeed. The positive ripple effect that this child may have on the rest of our world would be enough to make me feel like I have done some good in the universe. Of course, my ultimate goal is to be able to help not one, but many students throughout my career. First, I need the knowledge and training that the SUNY New Paltz Secondary Education Program has to offer.
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