Book Review: Blood Meridian

"Blood Meridian" by Cormac McCarthy is brutal, violent, and awesome. Its a bloody retelling of manifest destiny, and i would like to think that its a pretty accurate portrayal of the scalp trade in Texas/Mexico during the mid 1800's. Reading this book was very humbling. It is without a doubt the most difficult novel i've read so far. Cormac McCarthy is a great storyteller with an insane vocabulary and a style all his own. People seem to dislike his lack of punctuation, but i enjoy it. Its confusing at times, but when you go back and reread a passage you realize that not only does it make perfect sense, but its incredibly written. The extreme environments are painted with words, and the characters are so hardened and  fierce without any remorse. They are disgustingly violent and their pure bad-assness makes it perfectly acceptable. 

"Blood Meridian" is a classic Western without all the hokey Western stereotypes getting in the way. This book is totally worth reading if you're into westerns, great storytelling, amazing writing, or just in the mood to read some gut-wrenching violence. There are some slow parts in the first half, but the second half flies by with tons of action and an ending that i found to be perfectly satisfying. The caliber of writing multiplied by the sheer fucked up-ness of the story makes the book one of my favorites. I enjoyed reading "The Road" but after reading "Blood Meridian" I am now a fan of Mr. McCarthy and plan on celebrating his entire catalogue.  

Final Grade: 5 Bloody Scalps out of 5

"Arrested Development" in Development

Like all great television comedies, "Arrested Development" was taken off the air way too soon. Despite winning a number of awards for best writing, it followed the likes of UCB, Stella, and Family Guy (twice) and was cancelled in it's prime. 

But now it's official... There will be an Arrested Development movie!!! Micheal Cera, Will Arnett, David Cross and the rest of the cast will reprise their roles as some of the funniest and awkward characters for the big screen. There are no plot details as of yet. But like the show, i'm sure it will include some great cameos and be very hilarious.  

The Song They Didn't Write?

When i first saw that iTunes/Coldplay ad I was instantly annoyed. The first thing that came to mind was what a terrible job they were doing trying to rip off one of my favorite bands, Arcade Fire. Perhaps i was being overly protective and reading a little too far into it. i know i know, Arcade Fire doesnt own the rights to playing that shoulder strap Revolutionary War style drum. And they are not the only band to harmonize in that choir-like way. But both are certainly signatures of their style. The fact that i specifically remember reading that Coldplay frontman Chris Martin called AF "one of the best bands in the world today" or something like that. It really makes me wonder if it was a conscious effort or not. 

This morning i was watching currentTV and they aired a "pod" about the BK based indie-pop band Creaky Boards. They are claiming that they were ripped off by Coldplay. This argument holds more water considering that its based on an actual song and not just a "style". The melody of the Coldplay song is almost exactly the same. In a truly ironic twist, the title of the original Creaky Boards song is "The Songs I Didnt Write". The band uploaded this video on youtube comparing both songs. It gets a little sour-grapey and desperate when they beg that their song is more fitting for the commercial. This is a great publicity stunt in any case. And they do make a valid point concerning the melody. It is strikingly similar! They also claim that they saw Chris Martin at one of their shows. Who knows how true that is?

When Coldplay released their first album, i actually liked a couple of songs. But since then, they contracted what i like to call "Jack Johnson Syndrome". For the record, Jack Johnson is lame but JJ Casuals are awesome. Anyway, JJS is a condition in which every song sounds almost identical to the last one. And Coldplay has got it bad. 

To get back to the point, perhaps Coldplay was simply inspired by these two bands.  In both cases the similarities seem to me to be more like "copycat" than "inspired by". And after watching the TERRIBLE live performance of the song on a recent award show, i was even more turned off. His voice sounded horrible, his stage presence was awkward (just stay seated behind the piano please), and the song as a whole sounded drab, empty, and boring. 

With all that said, if 10% of celebrities were concerned about and donated to social and political organizations as much as Chris Martin, the world would be in better shape. 

KnockKnock. Who's There? You're Fired!

"Shabby isn't a strong enough word." That's the response of former Mets manager Willie Randolph when asked to characterize how he's been treated by the organization. i would have to agree. For those who are not aware, Willie was recently fired by GM Omar Minaya in his hotel room at 3am. Considering that the standard for managerial firing is after a game. Considering that Minaya has been saying he wants to stick with Randolph. Considering that Willie specifically told the GM, "If you're going to do this, do this now. I know you've got a lot of pressure on you, but if I'm not the guy to lead this team, then don't let me get on this plane [to Anaheim]." That is pretty shabby. 

Class is an important aspect in sports. It's what separates all-stars from excellent players. It's why Derek Jeter, Lebron James, Peyton Manning, and Mark Messier are so well respected. It's what Roger Clemens, Ron Artest,  and Michael Vick all lack. It's why I refuse watch a Knicks game. They are a bunch of no-class bums and thugs that are ruining the good name of a classic franchise. Why are they allowing Isaiah Thomas to remain a part of the organization? Why don't they just release never-was a "Starbury"? Hopefully D'Antoni can turn things around and bring some much needed class back to NY basketball. 

But i digress. Let's get back to business. Omar Minaya has been a class act since he's been the GM of my beloved Metropolitans. He's almost single-handedly turned the organization around. That's why this move is so shocking. A change was definitely needed at Shea. A trade is usually an effective way to shake up a clubhouse. The bottom line is that this wasn't a managerial problem. Yes, the Met's are under .500 since the "collapse" at the end of last season. But when the five best hitters are all batting under .300, Reyes not successfully stealing bases, and a so-far sub-par pitching, you can't expect to win games. But we are not even halfway through this season. Let's give Minaya a chance to prove that this was the right move. There is plenty of time right the ship. And if not, as us Mets fans are used to saying, there's always next year...

Asshole in a Half-Shell

Yesterday we found this Common Snapping Turtle (Chelydra Serpentina) in our backyard. It burrowed its way under the garden fence and then couldn't find its way out. Idiot. Apparently they can live up to 70 years and can weigh between 20 and 70 lbs. This one looked like it was about 30 lbs. It had some sick claws and was able to reach it's neck like halfway back, over the top of it's shell. Having had recently tried to help one across the street only to have it take a few chunks out of my skateboard, i decided not to mess with this one. Call me crazy, but I like my fingers. Tom came to the rescue and displayed his superior turtle-wrangling abilities. If you ever need to move a tig-ol'-burtle, just use a stick to put it on it's back. Then you can safely pick it up without losing any digits. 

The Third Rule of Project Mayhem is...

...you decapitate the people on billboards and collage in a bloody stump. A new artist/protestor/head-hater has been recently wreaking havoc on London advertisements. Of course this now means that the word is pronounced {ad-vertis-mint}. Said to be reacting to the ever-increasing amount of outdoor ads, the "artist" has been targeting mainly high fashion and shitty film adverts. The attention to detail is rad.  Some call this practice "culture jamming". Wikipedia defines it as "subvertising".  Whatever you wanna call it, I hope it continues. Not only does it look kinda bad ass, it will hopefully pave the way for more "Clean Cities" like Sao Paulo, Brazil. A city that has almost completely banned outdoor advertisements in order to fight visual pollution. There's only one problem. Without advertising, how will I know what type of women I should be attracted to?

I just like this photo. Taken in 1925, it's a shot of an assembly line at the Atwater Kent factory in Philly. They are making radios. The fourth girl up, on the left side, can't help but strike a pose for the camera. A true pioneer of "fierceness".

FRESH!!!

A new start. A clean slate. A deleted account. A Revampification. The new era. Let us begin...